A Response to Death

After reading Eliot's incredible blog from yesterday, I got to thinking about death and how it affects me. I'm proud to say that I do keep death in mind (as well as the possibility of a zombie apocalypse), but I don't really, dare I say it, give a shit. Death is not something I necessarily fear, but I also hope to avoid it as long as possible. Though, I think by most people's standards, I'm not doing such a good job.

I have this habit that most people consider to be very disgusting, but rightly so. I am a smoker, yes, it's true. I smoke cigarettes, and honestly, it doesn't really phase me like it does others. People look at it as this thing that only trashy gross people do, and that's just not true. I'm not trashy; I go through every motion to not be. I just smoke because, well, because I'm addicted I guess. And they will more than likely cut a few years off my life, if not all the years, and it doesn't really bother me too much.

I guess the reason death doesn't really bother me is that everyone I know and idolize will or has already died. Whether they were a great mind, a musician, a liar, a criminal, or a grandparent, they died the same way everyone else did: by losing all their life. I guess my favorite part of knowing I'll die comes from knowing that. One day I'll be in the same earth as my favorites, Charles Darwin, F. Scott Fitzgerald and Zelda, Hemingway, Ian Curtis, and one day, all my friends and family. It's a sad thought, but at the same time, it's a very beautiful thought. We will all become one in the soil, where we'll decompose and become a part of whatever bug or plant eats us (unless you choose to believe in God and heaven), then ignore that part. I don't want to force my beliefs on you.

I know this post is short, but I'm in need of a shower, so I must be taking off. Hopefully this shower won't be my last; hopefully I don't have a stroke, or a heart attack, or get shot or something. Lets hope. I wanna be alive for at least 25 years. At most, 45.

-CORYROBINSON